If You Have To Ask, You Already Know

True stories from Starbucks...

This morning I am working from home. I took a break and went to get my Americano, and let's just say that not much has changed since I rolled out of bed except that I changed my clothes. I'm in line and I can hear muttering behind me. And you know, people talk to themselves, whatever.

So I get my drink and go over to the bar, hoping to find a normal sized straw. The guy who was behind me is at the bar and he's dressed like he's about to go hunting elephants. I set my drink down and unwrap the straw since this guy isn't going to move.

He says to me, "Well, you're very attractive, how do I look?"

I turn to him, he's giving me the elevator, and giving himself the elevator.

I said, "You look like an idiot".