The No Child's Behind Left Behind Act

Who cut the cheese?

Middle school issues ban on intentional flatulence

CAMDEN (Feb 1): The Merriam Webster Dictionary definition for flatulence is brief: "flatus expelled through the anus." And while it's a natural bodily function, it seems some Camden-Rockport Middle School eighth-grade boys are taking it to new heights and making a game of seeing who can expel the loudest and grossest flatus.

According to this week's Fire Cracker school newsletter though, the joke's on the boys as the penalty for "intentional farting" is now a detention.

I sent this to a friend of mine who really should have his own talk show or at least a blog. I totally miss working for him. Here's why:

"The obvious defense here is "unintentional" flatulence. The only way to affirmatively prove intentional from unintentional is the absence of an "announcement" that typically proceeds intentional flatulence, so the kids could keep up their game, and feign "mistake."

That said, they can always substitute burping, knuckle cracking and shoulder punches for farting.

Don't school administrators have something important to do..., Like EDUCATE the kids?!?!

Instead of "No child left behind," is it now, "No child's behind left behind?"