So this is the situation of someone I have known for many years, but she has never been in such a position. And it's bad, I wouldn't want to be her.
So what did I do?
I told her what she should do, bluntly because she apparently hasn't heard me before. I gave some examples of how I fixed my life at different times. Heck, all the changes in my life over the past six months have been pretty topsy turvy and there has been some fallout, but I made a plan (kicking and screaming, I might add) and I'm sticking to it. I even have the help of meeting with my parents once a week to review my progress on what I want to accomplish.
Kicking and screaming still happens from time to time, but I know what I want in the end. I explained that to her because she can't expect a quick fix.
So I'm getting the silent treatment. She's talking to me but it's not like it was. Then it occurred to me: she's mad at me because I'm doing what needs to be done. I'm sticking with the hard choices. And I am far from where I want to be, but I'm not worried anymore because I have a plan and I asked for support. And I don't want to let down the ones who are supporting me. Oh, btw, I don't want to let myself down, either.
Just thought I'd throw that in there.
What is apparent to me though, is that soon there will be too much of a divide for me to get along with her anymore. I wish she had made different choices, but you can't help someone who only wants you to commiserate with them instead of push them forward.